Tomorrow is the day! I’m going to start doing some @growco.rehab from home! The classes are focused on the pelvic floor and the core (rhymes). 

Before having Milo I had zero issues with my pelvic floor. I was told I had almost Olympic strength pelvic floor muscles! 🏋🏼‍♀️ 

I wasn’t worried about having postpartum issues. I had a pretty normal birth experience. Don’t get me wrong, it sucked and I had tearing, swelling, and didn’t feel back to normal for a long ass time. WAY longer than 6 weeks! 

After recovering I didn’t notice any issues until about 18 months postpartum. First it was a sneeze and leak, then it was a TikTok dance and a leak. Then came the horrible lower back pain. 

Think about a sprained ankle. If you don’t do the proper rehab, even though you are “recovered” and you can walk again, over time issues start to arise. Stiffness, tightness, pain, etc. Then you start compensating for your bad ankle and issues start to arise in your knee or other random places you never previously injured. 

THE SAME THING HAPPENS TO YOUR PELVIC FLOOR/CORE AFTER PREGNANCY AND CHILDBIRTH! 

After just learning to breathe into my pelvic floor and relax my muscles, my lower back pain is almost non-existent. 

Now I’m ready to do more with the help of @drallicain and @growco.rehab. 

They have a Black Friday sale on this week. 50% off your one time payment to be a life long member! 

If you’re interested in joining me in this postpartum rehab journey, click the link in my bio ♥️ 
—————————————————
#postpartumjourney #postpartum #pelvicfloorexercises #pelvicfloorphysicaltherapy #pelvicfloor #postpartumrecovery

Tomorrow is the day! I’m...

The Mom Room Podcast 🎙

EP37. Renee has an honest chat with sleep and wellness consultant, Angela Bueno (@nurtureevesleep). Topics include: the difference between your baby BEING independent and ACTING independent; emotional regulation or \"self-soothing\"; attachment; validating a mother\'s instincts, and; so much more. 

There is a lot of pressure to get your baby sleeping through the night now a days. Angela is all about doing what is best for YOUR family and not letting other people decide what is a problem for you. Nurture Eve Sleep offers sleep support that focuses on connection and validates your instincts. #themomroompodcast

The Mom Room Podcast 🎙...

We had such a rough morning with Milo today. He was having a hard time. The biggest meltdown happened after his granola bar broke in half. You would have thought someone just told him he could never see Buzz or Woody again. That was the level of meltdown. 

I tried to fix everything by offering him a new granola bar. Just when I thought everything would be okay, that one broke too. Cue an even worse meltdown. I felt bad because clearly that was very upsetting for him. 

When he calmed down we went for a walk (him being constrained in a stroller was appealing). After our walk we decided to go for a car ride to McDonalds and get lunch. He watched Paw Patrol on our way there. 

I handed him french fries on the drive home. He was so happy. And it was at that moment that I realized why they call it a “Happy Meal”. 🍟 @mcdonaldscanada ————— 

#momcomedy #honestmom #toddlermom #parentingtips #torontomoms #toddlersofinstagram #tiredmomsbelike #toddlerlife #parentingishard #momsbelike #tiktok #parentsbelike #momhumour #momhumor #funnymoms #parentingmeme #momprobs #bloggermom #sarcasticmom #momsbelike #mommeme #funnymoms #motherhood #momtruths #momstruggles #parentinghumour #parentsbelike #parentingmeme #parenting101 #myhonestmotherhood

We had such a rough...

Prior to me hitting record Milo was NOT having his socks and shoes. I thought he was gonna have to go barefoot. But, the recording and all the options to make him feel like he was in control really helped! 😃 my first #winning toddler life IGTV!

Prior to me hitting record...

Teeth brushing has gone through so many phases. Went well for a while, wouldn’t do it for a while, now he’s obsessed with toothpaste... 🤦🏼‍♀️ #momcomedy #honestmom #toddlermom #parentingtips #toddlers #toddlersofinstagram #tiredmomsbelike #toddlerlife #parentingishard #momsbelike #tiktok #parentsbelike #momhumour #momhumor #funnymoms #parentingmeme #momprobs #bloggermom #sarcasticmom #momsbelike #mommeme #funnymoms #motherhood #momtruths #momstruggles #parentinghumour #parentsbelike #parentingmeme #parenting101 #myhonestmotherhood

Teeth brushing has gone through...

Episode #35. Renee chats with pediatric physiotherapist, Jennifer Halfin about all things physical development. They discuss the physical development milestone ranges (the ranges are huge by the way), tips for helping your little one to master certain skills, and playground safety. Milestones can be a very stressful part of parenting but, it doesn\'t have to be. We hope the information in this episode will be educational for parents and decrease any stress they may have around common physical milestones like sitting up, crawling, and walking.  @torontokidsphysio #themomroompodcast

Episode #35. Renee chats with...

And that is a fact. 😁 @gocleanco 
————————————

#momcomedy #honestmom #toddlermom #parentingtips #torontomoms #toddlersofinstagram #tiredmomsbelike #toddlerlife #parentingishard #momsbelike #tiktok #parentsbelike #momhumour #momhumor #funnymoms #parentingmeme #momprobs #bloggermom #sarcasticmom #momsbelike #mommeme #funnymoms #motherhood #momtruths #momstruggles #parentinghumour #parentsbelike #parentingmeme #parenting101 #myhonestmotherhood

And that is a fact....

Dear people who think the decision to have children should be based solely on whether you ENJOY playing with kids... #momcomedy #honestmom #toddlermom #parentingtips #torontomoms #toddlersofinstagram #tiredmomsbelike #toddlerlife #parentingishard #momsbelike #tiktok #parentsbelike #momhumour #momhumor #funnymoms #parentingmeme #momprobs #bloggermom #sarcasticmom #momsbelike #mommeme #funnymoms #motherhood #momtruths #momstruggles #parentinghumour #parentsbelike #parentingmeme #parenting101 #myhonestmotherhood

Dear people who think the...

Five Challenges That Come With Being a StepMom: Grace’s Story

I didn’t grow up expecting to be a stepmom. It wasn’t part of the plan. But here we are. My name is Grace, I’m 29, a PhD student, and over COVID I became a newlywed and stepmom! My husband is nine years older and when we started dating, he had a 4-year-old boy and a 6-year-old daughter. Now 5 and 8, we have the kids at our house half of the time. Our original plan was to get married in June, take a two-week honeymoon, have the kids in school for one week, and then start our summer as a new family of four. Instead we were married in our living room in March, moved into a new house April 1stand began the COVID quarantine.

Life has handed me some of the best surprises in these unexpected twists and turns. It’s hard to think back to a time that these two little people weren’t a part of my life. I love them in an unconditional and limitless way. The kind of love that makes you want to watch them sleep and stroke their hair just thinking about who they might grow up to be. These last few months have brought the highest of highs, but also some major frustrations and challenges. Today’s blog post is about the 5 biggest challenges I’ve encountered in my first five months of step-parenthood.

The first of which is the suddenness of it all. I went from living on my own, sleeping in, with my only responsibility to myself and my mini-goldendoodle, to early rising, home bound with two kids. There was no honeymoon trip and no honeymoon period. It was as though I turned on a lightswitch with a heap of new responsibilities. It was less of stepping into a new role and much more like cannonballing in. Most of us expect to plan for a child, get pregnant, carry the baby for nine months, and slowly wade through all of the child development seasons, adding more children to the mix as we see fit (with some surprises). Jumping into life with two little people midway through child development has been a shock to the system. I sometimes (actually frequently) catch myself envying moms who get to start from the beginning.

How do I compare as a wife? How do I compare as a mom? As a cook? As a snuggler? As a bedtime story reader? Both in my husband’s eyes and children’s.

The second major challenge I’ve encountered is the comparison I find myself engaging in. How do I compare as a wife? How do I compare as a mom? As a cook? As a snuggler? As a bedtime story reader? Both in my husband’s eyes and children’s. I frequently receive the statement, ‘Mommy doesn’t do it like that’ or ‘Mommy uses the green polysporin because it doesn’t sting’ or ‘sing the bedtime song that Mommy does’. A first reaction is to let envy, jealousy, or frustration set in. When this happens, I try and have a calming breath and think about the many different approaches to parenting. I ask myself what strategies might be helpful to adopt from their birth mom, while trying to stay true to the mom I want to be and attempting to keep a cool composure with the kids.

Co-momming is an experience I doubt many women anticipate. Like it or not, you are on a team with someone you didn’t pick to be on a team with. It is not just a short-term partnership either, but a lifelong linkage. Never did I think I would need to justify haircut decisions, outfit choices, negotiate extracurriculars, or run anyone else by my puberty talks. I’ve thought it best to have a light friendship of sorts, allowing us to text quick questions, exchange photos, and keep each other in the loop. It has been a process of setting up firm, but polite boundaries, knowing that there is a reason my spouse is no longer with this person and acknowledging that we may have distinct and competing priorities.

Sharing custody is like being attached to an anchor. You can’t plan a month-long vacation, decide to move somewhere else, or take a last-minute ski trip across the border.

I grew up with amazing parents who instilled a love of travel and adventure. When my brother and I were 11 and 13, but parents (both teachers) took us out of school for the year to travel the world. I didn’t expect to replicate this exact trip with my family and children, but I did hope to include travel (spontaneous and planned) in our life. Sharing custody is like being attached to an anchor. You can’t plan a month-long vacation, decide to move somewhere else, or take a last-minute ski trip across the border. Instead, you can make the most of your time with the kids and try to bring the experiences to them.

I’ve read about other moms having experiences of ‘mom-guilt’. I can only speak to my experience with stepmom-guilt, but it has been a doozy. Guilt has been more pervasive than I would have expected. I frequently feel guilty toward my children, my husband, or both. When the kids leave to go to their other home, I sometimes take a sigh of relief, joyful to have some quiet and restore some order and cleanliness in our home. I also feel guilty when I compare our kids to the hypothetical ones I had planned, or the ones we hope to have in the future. I catch myself thinking that if my blood and DNA had been in the picture or my parenting involved from the beginning maybe things would be different. Maybe they would like to read more and have better listening skills or table manners. When these judgey thoughts come in, I get an overwhelming feeling of guilt. I realize my own arrogance and naivety in the situation. When we are, God-willing, able to have more children, I’m hoping that this expectation vs. reality tension may have some resolve.

One thing I know is that mom life of any shape or size is not easy! In sharing my experience as a stepmom I hope to make others feel less alone and normalize these tough topics and conversations in the mom community. I also want to end off by acknowledging the really incredible, happy-tear filled moments that come with being a stepmom. I encourage you to reach out, check in, and follow along my journey as a mom/wife/woman on my @_aplaceforgrace Instagram page where I share about tricky bits and lessons learned along my journey.

Grace xx

XOXO Renee Reina

Subscribe so you don’t miss a post
Sign up with your email address to receive news and updates!

What do you think?

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

No Comments Yet.

Previous
Navigating COVID with a Newborn: Courtney’s Story
Five Challenges That Come With Being a StepMom: Grace’s Story